How did Surrogate Partner Therapy get started?

SPT was created in the 1960s by Drs. Virginia E. Johnson and William H. Masters to address “sexual inadequacy”. Andrew Heartman, co-founder of Surrogate Partner Collective, has written about the ways SPT has changed since its inception as “sexual surrogacy” to how we work today with relational skills, personal connection, and consent-focused growth.

https://www.surrogatepartner.us/blog/Evolution-of-SPT.htm

Can just anyone call themselves a Surrogate Partner?

To identify and advertise as a professional Surrogate Partner, we must be trained and certified through a formal program. My training is through Surrogate Partner Collective, which has an application and interview process and then a two-phase program: an experiential workshop that brings us into our own bodies, and a virtual course to continue developing the skills we will use with clients. We must also complete two supervised cases in order to earn our certification.

You can see details here:

https://www.surrogatepartnercollective.org/training

How do I trust someone advertising as a Surrogate Partner?

This work requires deep vulnerability. In order to maintain safety for both the surrogate and the client, there are scrupulous ethical boundaries to prevent abuse and manage expectations. SPC holds clear ethical standards for its members:

https://www.surrogatepartnercollective.org/ethics-and-legality

https://www.surrogatepartnercollective.org/sp-code-of-conduct

Although there are only around 100 of us currently practicing in the US, we have a thriving community that offers continuing education, clinician and client referrals, mentoring, resource sharing, and accountability. We also receive focused support and oversight during our early career.

Do I really need a therapist for SPT?

You really do. The Triadic Model of Client-Surrogate-Clinician is essential to keep the work focused on your therapeutic goals and in service to your needs. However, although we generally talk about working with a therapist, any talk-focused provider can collaborate in this work: social workers, psychologists, intimacy coaches, etc who you might be doing work with around relationships and intimacy. I can work with your existing provider, or I can refer you to someone in my network.

I’d like to know more before I reach out.

Of course! Here are some resources I recommend for more of a deep dive:

Lou Hansen, a Surrogate Partner who is also a licensed therapist, has a fantastic video on her website that shows a documentary-style view of the work from the perspectives of both client and surrogate, in an episode of the CNN series “This Is Life” with Lisa Ling:

https://www.dcsurrogatepartnership.com/about-spt

The EMBRACE group offers multiple resources for prospective clients as well as clinicians and surrogates, including informational calls:

https://www.embracespt.org/

Brian Gibney, one of the leading experts on SPT, has an excellent appearance on a recent episode of Midori’s Consent Dojo:

https://fhp-inc.com/Consent-Dojo/